TGIF --- CORNY!!
Q: How do you know when it's going to be a good day at work?
A: When you see your boss' picture on the side of the milk carton.
Q: What do you call 1000 lawyers chained together under the sea? A: a good start
A blonde, brunette and redhead all decide to participate in the swimming of the English channel.
They all decided to do the same stroke as it would be fair and they should all finish at the same time. Not wanting to lose energy quickly, they chose breast stroke.
They all started and a few hours later, the brunette arrives on land, tired.
The next one to complete it, was the redhead, a couple of hours behind the brunette.
Lastly, 6 hours after the brunette had arrived, the blonde clambers on shore, absolutely exhausted.
When the TV crew arrived, they asked her why she took so long, she replied: "Not to be a sore loser or anything but I'm pretty sure I saw the other two using their arms."
A guy was on trial for murder and if convicted, would get the electric chair. His brother found out that a red neck was on the jury and figured he would be the one to bribe. He told the red neck that he would be paid $10,000 if he could convince the rest of the jury to reduce the charge to manslaughter. The jury was out an entire week and returned with a verdict of manslaughter. After the trial, the brother went to the red neck’s house, told him what a great job he had done and paid him the $10,000. The red neck replied that it wasn’t easy to convince the rest of the jury to change the charge to manslaughter. They all thought he was not guilty and, wanted to let him go.