The year 2029

[sonic04edge]

The Year 2029
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia formally known as California.

Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.

Baby conceived naturally... scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iran, Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon).

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being over taken by Jamaica.

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year, $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise are the keys to weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.

New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.

Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

And last but certainly not the least...

Florida voters still don't know how to use a voting machine.

[Brent]

but President Chelsea Clinton

**** no

[Kyle]

Originally Posted by sonic04edge

The Year 2029

Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year, $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise are the keys to weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

Florida voters still don't know how to use a voting machine.

those are the best

[Mjcorn23]

A woman will have her mouth shut :bigeyes:

[Seph]

rofl

[Mjcorn23]

Now that is surprising can we just jump to that part

[Warfire80]

France pleads for global help after being over taken by Jamaica

[Thomas91169]

what happened to the one that says "english still struggling to keep its spot as 3rd most widely spoken language in california"?

btw

RE

[sonic04edge]

Originally Posted by EclipseGSTdude

what happened to the one that says "english still struggling to keep its spot as 3rd most widely spoken language in california"?

btw

RE

I looked couldn't find any other thread related to it so there for NOT a report

[STEVE]

[leo95]

Ha, now that's some good stuff.

[WhiteStang99]

:lastweek:


but still funny.

[tedness]

Originally Posted by sonic04edge

Florida voters still don't know how to use a voting machine.

you try using one of those things!

[Kyle]

Originally Posted by tedness

you try using one of those things!

you just go in there, push the button of the person you wanna vote for, and then press the "cast vote" button. at least thats the ones we have. its not that hard, i promise (j/k)

[WhiteStang99]

[Kyle]

^ awesome

[Tbird232ci]

"eleventy-billion becomes an official number"

[MonteCitan]

LOL @ registering NAIL CLIPPERS

and this

"Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut."

[wiarumas]

lol that was good man

[red herring]

:patriot: