Avoided a HUGE accident today *WW* - Mustang Evolution

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Old 05-10-2005, 06:53 PM   #1
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Avoided a HUGE accident today *WW*

So I was driving to work today on the highway like I always do. About half way there, I felt this weird feeling. I got all nausious and such. I had to take a HUGE dump. The highway is a tollway straight into downtown, so no off-ramps that have access to gas stations. no bueno. I am having to drive for an extra 10-15min to find something. I am not liking the feeling. lol. I made it to work, and had to stop at the downstairs bathroom and couldn't even put all my stuff in my office first.

I swear I came so close to ****ting myself on my way to work. That would have sucked. At least I work in a hospital so I could have gotten a set of scrubs easily and worn those. It was close.



Just thought I would take a minute to try to lure people in to reading about this with the thread title and have some fun.
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Old 05-10-2005, 06:55 PM   #2
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glad it all came out well for you
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Old 05-10-2005, 06:58 PM   #3
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yeah cant imagine walking into work with ****ted pants
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Old 05-10-2005, 07:01 PM   #4
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the question is: would you have posted if you **** yourself in your car this morning?
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Old 05-10-2005, 07:04 PM   #5
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I wouldn't have. Just thought it would be fun and stupid at the same time to post this up.
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Old 05-10-2005, 07:07 PM   #6
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you would've looked pretty funny walking into work w/ a load in your pants lol
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Old 05-10-2005, 07:15 PM   #7
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i know your pain. you know what sucks:
when your giving a speech for your communications class and you get half way thru your sentence and your voice changes b/c this bad feeling hits you like a ton of bricks, and people look at you like your crazy b/c of the change of voice.

and then after the speech i hauled *** outta that class and headed toward the nearest bathroom.
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Old 05-10-2005, 07:40 PM   #8
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one of my coworkers sharted today...

we were eating lunch.. one guy let loose..

another guy tried to counter... then without saying anything, got up and went to the bathroom
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Old 05-10-2005, 07:52 PM   #9
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lol.....sharting has to be one of the worst things in the world
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Old 05-10-2005, 08:03 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The Arson
lol.....sharting has to be one of the worst things in the world
And yet one of the funniest words ever.
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Old 05-10-2005, 08:21 PM   #11
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yup ^
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Old 05-10-2005, 09:31 PM   #12
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sounds like you were in a ****ty situation
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Old 05-10-2005, 09:59 PM   #13
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i got two stories, one is about me, one is about my friend

i was going down to bathesda, which is about 45 minutes from here, i was having a previous tooth problem, where if i drank water, the pain would stop, so i was pounding down almost 8 liters a day, on top of soda and all

so i leave to go to bathesda, dressed up nicely (for me anyways), and i head down, about 5 minutes into the trip, i have to pee, i think, no big deal, ill just wait, about 15 minutes go by, and holy ****...i gotta go

i hop onto 495, which is populated with traffic, my legs are starting to tingly, my jimmy is starting to hurt, i had to go bad, my body was trying to let me pee, and i was clenching my body holding it back

im to the point to where i think im gonna piss myself, i get onto rt355, i pull off into a nieghborhood, a private neighborhood, and run into someones backyard and piss for like, 5 minutes, while people are walking by, staring at me, pissing away, my knee's got weak it felt so good to pe

so i get back into my car, and i look down, and i have a huge spot on my pants, about the size of a CD, crank my heat to try to dry it, wasnt happening, so i got to where i was going, and just went in, wet spot and all

my friends story

my friend has a history with taco bell, he gets nasty runs after eating it

so we were eating taco bell, and we rode our bikes to a friends house, and we left our bikes there, and we started to ding-dong-ditch houses, well, we get about 2 or 3 houses, then we go up to a house, my friend rings the door bell, and just ****s his pants, he had the runs so bad he didnt know he had to go

the door flys open, and my friend starts studdering, we're all dying laughing, the guy got pissed, slammed the door, and my friend waddled over to us like "dude...i **** my pants" and we were rolling

so we walk back to our friends house, who was an attractive female, he goes to use her bathroom, he takes off his boxers, finishs poopin what he can, wiped, then he threw his boxers into her trash can and left...and mind you...they were covered in ****

to this day, no one has told her who the boxers belong to
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Old 05-10-2005, 10:17 PM   #14
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ROFL great stories
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Old 05-11-2005, 02:48 AM   #15
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hahah good ****
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Old 05-11-2005, 06:24 AM   #16
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literally
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Old 05-11-2005, 07:17 AM   #17
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bajajajja oh god
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Old 05-11-2005, 12:49 PM   #18
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something else that sucked bad:

im the best Pump It Up player (dance games for you newbs) locally, so whenever i play, eyes are on me, and my girlfriend was sitting like, 3 feet behind the game while i was playing, i was doing a level 16 on crazy, which was pretty damn hard, and i had to fart really bad, so im trying to hold it, doing this song thats pretty nasty, so i said **** it, and let it out, my *** spit all over the place...it was disgusting, and it was loud as hell

after my round, i went into the bathroom, wiped my ***, and had to throw my boxers away, but they didnt have trashcans in the stalls, and i wasnt going to try to flush em, so i tried to wrap my boxers in a paper towel or two, i walk out of the stall, go to throw them into the trash can, and a door host was standing there, saw that i had wrapped boxers, and just burst out laughing

i dipped outa that bathroom quick...and dont play dance games commando, especially with jeans on
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Old 05-11-2005, 01:37 PM   #19
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lmfao, this thread has made me laugh more than any other thread on the site.
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Old 05-11-2005, 10:49 PM   #20
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I agree great stories, I am glad I have never **** myself, sounds embarassing
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Old 05-11-2005, 11:05 PM   #21
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Hahahaha, those are all great.
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Old 05-12-2005, 12:40 AM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tbird232ci
something else that sucked bad:

im the best Pump It Up player (dance games for you newbs) locally, so whenever i play, eyes are on me, and my girlfriend was sitting like, 3 feet behind the game while i was playing, i was doing a level 16 on crazy, which was pretty damn hard, and i had to fart really bad, so im trying to hold it, doing this song thats pretty nasty, so i said **** it, and let it out, my *** spit all over the place...it was disgusting, and it was loud as hell

after my round, i went into the bathroom, wiped my ***, and had to throw my boxers away, but they didnt have trashcans in the stalls, and i wasnt going to try to flush em, so i tried to wrap my boxers in a paper towel or two, i walk out of the stall, go to throw them into the trash can, and a door host was standing there, saw that i had wrapped boxers, and just burst out laughing

i dipped outa that bathroom quick...and dont play dance games commando, especially with jeans on
I wish I could have that as my sig.
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Old 05-12-2005, 10:51 AM   #23
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Quote:
Originally Posted by red herring
I wish I could have that as my sig.
make some cliffnotes
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