so the gf's mom thinks I'm cheating...

[jimmy_beaner]

because I didn't skip the last two weeks of school to be with my gf through her tests for cancer... I could hear her on the phone as I was talking to her tonight. "you need to find out why he never calls"...."it's because he's having sex with another girl"..... "he's got another gf".... soo tired of this crap. I know for a fact **** about her... and trust me, she's done way more than I have (which is nothing), and to her husband.

[Tbird232ci]

who cares?

[jimmy_beaner]

ummmm, I do? This has potential complications, all leading to giving me stress, and thus, and early heart attack... or a stroke. Seriously, the last month has been stressful enough.

[Zim]

sucks :dunno:

[jimmy_beaner]

yeah, apparently, her whole family doesn't like me now because I didn't take the last 2 weeks off school to be with her through her tests. I'm sorry I don't live in magic land where I can just skip school and it be ok. I'm sorry I have pre-med classes that require you to do homework... I'm sorry I have things called TESTS... the stress is mounting, and something will have to give, and I know it won't be the pre-med classes.

[Dark02Pony]

**** her dude if your chic is gonna believe some bull**** like that although its her mother without talking to you about it then its not worth it

[Zim]

i just honestly dont care about this drama... maybe its just me?

[Tbird232ci]

Drama is an easy thing to fix. End the relationship. End yourself. Simple.

[jimmy_beaner]

yeah, you try telling a girl that just got diagnosed with cancer that you're dumping her because her mom is psycho... after you've dated her for 21.5 months. I feel bad for her still, no teenage kid deserves to get cancer... not that anyone does, but especially a teenager. But I know I can't live under this stress. all I hear is how I never call, and yet, 95% of the calls made on my phone are from, or to her. I really don't think a $300 phone bill will solve this problem either.

[Tbird232ci]

Ive told a girl who had serious self esteem issues, who was about to get emancipated at the age of 16, was unstable, and very attached to me that i didnt want to date her. She had to go to therapy over it.

Once it was over, it wasnt my problem.

[Brent]

Well maybe he is looking for opinions of people that actually care about others?

Sorry if caring for others that are not perfect doesn't fall into your thinking but the majority of people here that have people that love going through something like cancer try to show their loved one how much they care instead of being an asshole and leaving them stranded with no one.

This is me being very nice, because your comments in this thread have really pissed me off.

and sorry Self-Esteem issues and cancer are not even the same sport.

[Thomas91169]

umm you tell here exactly that youre dumping her over her psycho mom. thatll create a rift between her and her mom, and maybe cause an end to the chaos in a cataclysmic argument where she tells her mom off, brings her closer to you, and forces her mom to finally shut the **** up.

or just tell her you cant take the stress and bull**** anymore and want out. no woman is worth stressing over, the longest and best relationships are the ones that happen naturally, and stress isnt natural.

[Brent]

Originally Posted by EclipseGSTdude

umm you tell here exactly that youre dumping her over her psycho mom. thatll create a rift between her and her mom, and maybe cause an end to the chaos in a cataclysmic argument where she tells her mom off, brings her closer to you, and forces her mom to finally shut the **** up.

or just tell her you cant take the stress and bull**** anymore and want out. no woman is worth stressing over, the longest and best relationships are the ones that happen naturally, and stress isnt natural.

How can you say his relationship did not occur naturally?

Cancer was not part of the equation and that surely induces strees when someone you care about falls to it.

Give me a break guys with this macho "I'm a badass mother****er" and realize that some people can really care for another person enough to get stressed out over them becoming extremely sick. It is something you should fight beaner, do not let her Mom when. If you care about her push it.

That is all I got to say, do not let something pass you by because of someone else.

[Tbird232ci]

Originally Posted by Brent

Well maybe he is looking for opinions of people that actually care about others?

I do care about others, but im harsh because issues can be easily solved by simply talking to someone, or getting away from the drama. You cant care about everyone else all the time...because then who is going to care about how you feel when you put up with their problems? yeah...nobody

Originally Posted by Brent

Sorry if caring for others that are not perfect doesn't fall into your thinking but the majority of people here that have people that love going through something like cancer try to show their loved one how much they care instead of being an asshole and leaving them stranded with no one.

Leaving them stranded? Sounds more like she's pushing him away, especially if she believes her mom.

Originally Posted by Brent

This is me being very nice, because your comments in this thread have really pissed me off.

Would you like a hug?

Originally Posted by Brent

and sorry Self-Esteem issues and cancer are not even the same sport.

When suicide attempts are brought into it...its a similar sport.

[Dark02Pony]

Originally Posted by Brent

Give me a break guys with this macho "I'm a badass mother****er" and realize that some people can really care for another person enough to get stressed out over them becoming extremely sick. It is something you should fight beaner, do not let her Mom when. If you care about her push it.

, but wether it be cancer or something minor when somebody you care about gets hurt or is sick just isnt right to turn your back. I know theres plenty of times ive changed my plans last min. to either stay and keep somebody company or whatever

[Tbird232ci]

Originally Posted by Brent

Give me a break guys with this macho "I'm a badass mother****er" and realize that some people can really care for another person enough to get stressed out over them becoming extremely sick. It is something you should fight beaner, do not let her Mom when. If you care about her push it.

That is all I got to say, do not let something pass you by because of someone else.

If you havnt noticed by now, i do have a girlfriend who i love very much so, and do care about her to the point to where when she's even upset, im upset by it, but of course because im rude and blunt on a messege board, im a heartless asshole

The thing is, if she believes her mom, there isnt **** beaner can do, if they believe he isnt calling enough, raising total hell, and accusing him of all kinds of BS...do you think its worth it? Do you think its worth the stress, on top of trying to take care of himself, his bills, his school, and everything else?

We are too young for this bull****, a lot of us here are still somewhat supported by our parents in one way or shape...we have the stress of our lives, then the stress of someone elses life? The way i see it, if someones life is so hard for you to put up with, making your own life difficult, its not worth it. You have to look out for yourself

but what do i know, i dont care about anyone but myself and am a complete asshole

[Brent]

Originally Posted by Tbird232ci

I do care about others, but im harsh because issues can be easily solved by simply talking to someone, or getting away from the drama. You cant care about everyone else all the time...because then who is going to care about how you feel when you put up with their problems? yeah...nobody

Caring about everyone else is a whole different story. We are talking about one person he has dated for who knows how long and is now sick, something that this person has no control over.

Leaving them stranded? Sounds more like she's pushing him away, especially if she believes her mom.

Ever had cancer? Know how it makes you feel? I bet you start hating the world and get pretty concerned about your life... I am saying don't just give him because she pushes away once. You are all ready to throw in the towel.

Would you like a hug?

Nope, just asking you be decent and not a smartass because I'm not the only one getting sick of it on here.

When suicide attempts are brought into it...its a similar sport.

That's when you get her help not turn away from her. You can end the relationship but you also should get her help, which you may or may not have done.

[Thomas91169]

no i remember jimmy has always had issues with this girl and posted about them. and if i remember he WAS looking to get out of it, then she got cancer, and now cant due to moral implications.

sorry, but im the kind of guy that avoids drama at all costs, cause i hate it severly, because most of it is not needed. just like her mom does not need to create more problems by spouting random rhetoric about him. **** that. there is enough stress in this situation already without her mom going ape****. if the daughter(gf) cared about jimmy, shed tell her mom to shut the hell up too.

[Brent]

Originally Posted by Tbird232ci

If you havnt noticed by now, i do have a girlfriend who i love very much so, and do care about her to the point to where when she's even upset, im upset by it, but of course because im rude and blunt on a messege board, im a heartless asshole

I was more talking to Eclipse with that statement to you anyway.

The thing is, if she believes her mom, there isnt **** beaner can do, if they believe he isnt calling enough, raising total hell, and accusing him of all kinds of BS...do you think its worth it? Do you think its worth the stress, on top of trying to take care of himself, his bills, his school, and everything else?

Hey all I am saying is don't give up, you replied with end himself... give me a break.

We are too young for this bull****, a lot of us here are still somewhat supported by our parents in one way or shape...we have the stress of our lives, then the stress of someone elses life? The way i see it, if someones life is so hard for you to put up with, making your own life difficult, its not worth it. You have to look out for yourself

You look out for yourself at the same time do not let something slip away without trying your damnest to get it back. Maybe its just me but I want to fight for things that I believe are rightly mine and if I did not do something wrong then I am going to fight to prove it!

but what do i know, i dont care about anyone but myself and am a complete asshole

With useless stupid comments like "End yourself" yes you are an asshole. That is uncalled for for one.

[Tbird232ci]

Originally Posted by Brent

Caring about everyone else is a whole different story. We are talking about one person he has dated for who knows how long and is now sick, something that this person has no control over.

But have you also heard the other problems theyve had in the relationship? Probably not. Have you talked with him on AIM and helped him out? Probably not.

Originally Posted by Brent

Ever had cancer? Know how it makes you feel? I bet you start hating the world and get pretty concerned about your life... I am saying don't just give him because she pushes away once. You are all ready to throw in the towel.

Ive been in situations where ive hated the world. No one here knows my history, and I keep it that way. Ive been one step away from living on the streets. I know what its like to hate the world.

Originally Posted by Brent

Nope, just asking you be decent and not a smartass because I'm not the only one getting sick of it on here.

*shrugs*

Originally Posted by Brent

That's when you get her help not turn away from her. You can end the relationship but you also should get her help, which you may or may not have done.

You cant help someone who isnt willing to help themselves. Yeah, you can talk to them, you can give advice, you can even hug them and care for them. If they arnt willing to change their life, there isnt **** you can do. I really dont think you have any idea how SERIOUS problems really are. Such as actual mental issues, not just the "im depressed, im going to cut my wrists" **** is

[Dark02Pony]

Originally Posted by Tbird232ci

When suicide attempts are brought into it...its a similar sport.

i know for a fact if i knew somebody wether it was my gf at the time or just a friend who was talking about or considering a suicide attempt and i didnt do something to help them out or get them help i sure as hell wouldnt be able to deal with that haunting me. Help is the 1st thing that would need to be done, 2nd would be moral support..cant just turn your back on somebody that makes the whole situation worse. They feel better when they know people are there for them and believe in them.

[Tbird232ci]

Originally Posted by Brent

I was more talking to Eclipse with that statement to you anyway.

So? I was agreeing with him...

Originally Posted by Brent

You look out for yourself at the same time do not let something slip away without trying your damnest to get it back. Maybe its just me but I want to fight for things that I believe are rightly mine and if I did not do something wrong then I am going to fight to prove it!

I can see you on Jerry Springer fighting for a girl who says "i dont love you" with the attitude like that sometimes. If someone pushes me away, i walk away, untill they come back to me.

Originally Posted by Brent

With useless stupid comments like "End yourself" yes you are an asshole. That is uncalled for for one.

Youd think by now youd know that you cant take everything on the internet seriously...

[jimmy_beaner]

I don't know yet what I'm going to do.. I think talking to her about this whole thing is the first step. If she really thinks I'm out doing stuff with other girls, then she'll probably want to end it. Over the past month and a half, (5 weeks before she got diagnosed), it felt like we were drifting apart. Just like, I'm changing as a person, and she's changing too, but not maturing, she's like anti-maturing.

I do still have feelings for her, but I won't throw away med school for any girl. I agree with tbird in that I do have to look out for my future... and any girl that would jeopardize my future is probably someone that doesn't have my, or our, best interests at heart.

I just have a lot of crap to think about, and no time... I've got a huge chem test in 2 days, and have been spending quite a bit of time studying that... and worrying about how the cancer thing will turn out. I realize she's pretty stressed, but I'm really stressed too. I've wanted to be over there, but with no way to get over there, and with stuff I have to study for... and then this thing tonight with her family "no longer liking me"... or "I'm not on their good side any more"... I don't really care what her family thinks of me. I've driven over there every other weekend for almost 2 years, and done that as religiously as I can. Figured it up to well over $2000 in gas so far... and then she tells me that I don't care. It isn't that I don't care, I've spent my money. I have a loan to pay off, and if I don't, they repo my dad's truck. It doesn't matter that he doesn't care about that truck any more.. I have a financial responsibility to pay off the loan, and I can't spend ALL of my loan money on gas to go see her every weekend.

[Tbird232ci]

Originally Posted by Dark02Pony

i know for a fact if i knew somebody wether it was my gf at the time or just a friend who was talking about or considering a suicide attempt and i didnt do something to help them out or get them help i sure as hell wouldnt be able to deal with that haunting me. Help is the 1st thing that would need to be done, 2nd would be moral support..cant just turn your back on somebody that makes the whole situation worse. They feel better when they know people are there for them and believe in them.

Sometimes you have to turn your back. Rock bottom is the only way for someone to turn their lives around. Amazingly enough, my ex straightened her life up and thanked me.

Holding someones hand through life doesnt help them, some things they have to get through by themselves.

[wiarumas]

i wouldnt worry about it. if i was you id just calm down, try to not think about it and focus on exams. **** her mom. you also have to take into consideration that she is also very stressed out over her daughter. maybe if you just ignore her for now she will think straight again later.

[Dark02Pony]

Originally Posted by Tbird232ci

Sometimes you have to turn your back. Rock bottom is the only way for someone to turn their lives around. Amazingly enough, my ex straightened her life up and thanked me.

Holding someones hand through life doesnt help them, some things they have to get through by themselves.

yes with some things. but something as serious as cancer or suicide which i was talking about you cant turn your back on

[jimmy_beaner]

by the way, everything in the relationship was great until this summer... she spent a month and a half at my house, and got mad that I had to sleep during the day, because she got bored, but I worked midnight to 8 am. So that's when the problems started, but they were small. It almost ended once or twice this summer, and then I posted on here when she gave me the option of dating other girls, but I'd have to ok them with her first... and after that fight is when I we started growing apart, and I stopped calling her all the time... and all that. So, that leaves us at the last 5 weeks, where she started her med testing in the last 2 weeks. I just don't want to throw it away if it's the meds and the cancer making her do stuff. I do have history with her, and her and I have shared a lot of firsts. But I also realize I can't throw everything away to be with her. I just need some time to think about this, and some time to talk to her. I realize regardless of how I feel about her, I do need to help her through this. that's just being a good friend if nothign else. It's just hard to believe how emotions can swing in the course of a couple months, from almost sure you want to marry them, to this point. And honestly, it isn't the cancer that's splitting us... someone asked me that today. I'm not figuring it in here at all, because that's not fair to her. I'm debating whether or not I still want to be with her based on how I feel when I'm with her.

[Brent]

I can see you on Jerry Springer fighting for a girl who says "i dont love you" with the attitude like that sometimes. If someone pushes me away, i walk away, untill they come back to me.

Nah I won't be seen on those shows because I am rational. Just because I am saying do not give up your throwing me in the other extreme of not being able to let go when you know its over.

Youd think by now youd know that you cant take everything on the internet seriously...

Sorry but the topic was serious and I didn't see any humor in it so I said what I said.

[Brent]

Oh and I am going by what was posted in this thread, which is all we have to go by... and all he decided to give us.

If you know more than kudos to you, but he posted what he posted and I responded to it.

[The Arson]

just like i told ya b4...you gatta either decide you wanna fix it completely or time to break it off maybe

[Tbird232ci]

Originally Posted by Brent

Oh and I am going by what was posted in this thread, which is all we have to go by... and all he decided to give us.

If you know more than kudos to you, but he posted what he posted and I responded to it.

Can we just get down to cuddling now?

[jimmy_beaner]

Originally Posted by Tbird232ci

Can we just get down to cuddling now?

I could go for some of that.

[Thomas91169]

dam homies, why we all fighting. its just beaner.

[wiarumas]

i think everyone should just get together, drink some beer and sing big hits from the 80s. its the only way to solve all this conflict.

[00vertstang]

Originally Posted by jimmy_beaner

because I didn't skip the last two weeks of school to be with my gf through her tests for cancer... I could hear her on the phone as I was talking to her tonight. "you need to find out why he never calls"...."it's because he's having sex with another girl"..... "he's got another gf".... soo tired of this crap. I know for a fact **** about her... and trust me, she's done way more than I have (which is nothing), and to her husband.

Quote "and to her husband". Are you talking about your gf mother, or are you dating a married woman?