Two Texas farmers, Jim and Bob, are sitting at their favorite
bar, drinking beer.
Jim turns to Bob and says, "You know, I'm tired of going
through life without college, I'm gonna sign up for some classes."
Bob thinks it's a good idea, and the two leave. The next day,
Jim goes down to the college and meets dean of Admissions, who signs
up for the four basic classes: Math, English, history, and Logic.
Logic?" Jim says. "What's that?"
The dean says, "I'll give you an example. Do you own a weed
"Yeah." "Then logically speaking, because you own a weed
I think that you would have a yard."
That's true, I do have a yard."
I'm not done, the dean says. "Because you have a yard, I
think logically that you would have a house."
Yes, I do have a house."
"And because you have a house, I think that you mightlogicallyhave a family."
Yes, I have a family."
I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you
must have a wife. And because you have a wife, then logic tells me you must be a heterosexual."
"I am a heterosexual. That's amazing, you were able to find out
all of that because I have a weed eater."
Excited to take the class now, Jim shakes the Dean's hand and
leaves to go meet Bob at the bar. He tells Bob about his classes, how
he is signed up for Math, English, History, and Logic.
Logic?" Bob says, "What's that?"
Jim says, "I'll give you an example. Do you have a weed
Then you're a queer."
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"Some people are like Slinkies; useless, but fun to push down the stairs."