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Old 08-08-2007, 08:56 AM   #1
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Ah crap.

So this morning I let my dog outside to take a crap like every morning. She usually stays out there for 20 or 30 minutes just licking her ***, eating sticks, and doing other dog stuff, then comes to the door and barks when she wants to come back in. Well, today she never barked so I went outside to see what she was doing. I find that the side gate to my yard is open, and the puppy is nowhere in site Fortunately, I found her across the street sniffing the neighbors trash. However, I do live next to one of the busiest streets in downtown Macon and she was not far from it. Needless to say, I am a tad bit upset.

So, I am now trying to figure who has been in my yard and what the hell they have been doing in it between midnight last night an 9:30 this morning. My gas and water meters are outside of the fence, so that rules them out. My electric meter is inside the fence, but I know for an absolute fact that no Georgia Power employee has been to my house since July 29th (perks of the job, heh). So that pretty much narrows it down to someone that should not have been in my yard. For now, I wrapped my bike lock around the fence so it can't be opened, but I would really like to rig up some sort of alarm so that I can catch the ****ing bastard and kick his ***.
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Old 08-08-2007, 09:26 AM   #2
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Re: Ah crap.

hmmm put up a camera
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Old 08-08-2007, 09:28 AM   #3
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Re: Ah crap.

One of those sentry guns out of Aliens would probably do the trick, too.
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Old 08-08-2007, 09:33 AM   #4
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Re: Ah crap.

Electric Fence...mmmmmm
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Old 08-08-2007, 10:10 AM   #5
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Re: Ah crap.

rig your fence door shut with a bunch of those party popper fireworks.

not only will you catch them, but ti will scare the **** out of them.

or a simple webcam will work (dunno about lighting).
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Old 08-08-2007, 10:15 AM   #6
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Re: Ah crap.

hahaha party poppers those were the ****
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Old 08-08-2007, 10:58 AM   #7
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Re: Ah crap.

Might try a simple pool door alarm or something alone those lines I installed a cheap *** window alarm runs on 9 Volt on the side yard fence door my dog will ram the door till it pops open or rig up a 12 ga.

Swimming Pool Alarms
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Old 08-08-2007, 12:07 PM   #8
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Re: Ah crap.

or better yet... dig a huge ditch on the other side of the door with spikes at the bottom.
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Old 08-08-2007, 12:32 PM   #9
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Re: Ah crap.

Yes. North Vietnam style. Make sure you cover the spikes in feces, to help cause infection.
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Old 08-08-2007, 06:37 PM   #10
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Re: Ah crap.

Hell with that, just dig a mote(sp?) all the way around your yard, fill it with water and put up a drawbridge. Then you can also keep the Black Knight at bay at the same time. :yup:
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Old 08-08-2007, 06:39 PM   #11
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Re: Ah crap.

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Originally Posted by bullitt482 View Post
Hell with that, just dig a mote(sp?) all the way around your yard, fill it with water and put up a drawbridge. Then you can also keep the Black Knight at bay at the same time. :yup:
Don't forget about the gators in the mote...
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Old 08-08-2007, 06:40 PM   #12
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Re: Ah crap.

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Don't forget about the gators in the mote...
It's a family guy reference.
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Old 08-08-2007, 09:16 PM   #13
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Re: Ah crap.

How is a small particle gonna keep intruders at bay? And how the hell would you fit some o' dem gators in one?

I'd use a moat personally. Filled with ravenous caribou hides.
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Old 08-08-2007, 10:20 PM   #14
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Re: Ah crap.

Piranhas in the moat. Definitely piranhas.
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Old 08-08-2007, 10:49 PM   #15
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Re: Ah crap.

put AIDS on the handle
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Old 08-09-2007, 12:26 AM   #16
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Re: Ah crap.

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Piranhas in the moat. Definitely piranhas.
A ravenous caribou hide would destroy a piranha in a kickboxing match. End of story.
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Old 08-09-2007, 08:09 AM   #17
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Re: Ah crap.

Quote:
Originally Posted by n8r View Post
put AIDS on the handle
If its a homeless guy, it wouldn't make a difference....
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