GT Mustangs

Herbstang · 10-21-2008, 10:19 AM

I heard my wife crying in the bathroom. 'Honey? What's wrong' I asked.

'Oh, George! Just look at me: I'm getting so old! I have more gray in my hair than blonde, I have varicose veins on both of my legs, and I'm just fat and wrinkled all over! I really need someone to say something positive about me right now!'

I looked deeply into her eyes and said softly: 'Your vision's real good, honey. That's something, isn't it?'

And that's when the fight started....

- - -

When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive.

So I took her to a gas station.

And that's when the fight started....

- - -

My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.

My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'

'Yes,' I sighed, 'She was my senior year girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.'

'My God!' says my wife. 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'

And that's when the fight started....

- - -

I asked my wife, 'Where do you want to go for our anniversary?'

It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation. 'Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!' she said.

So I suggested, 'How about the kitchen?'

And that's when the fight started....

- - -

My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have sex?'

'No,' she answered.

I then said, 'Is that your final answer?'

She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying 'Yes.'

So I said, 'Then I'd like to phone a friend.'

And that's when the fight started....

1234 · 10-21-2008, 01:37 PM

nice

n8r · 10-21-2008, 02:27 PM

Hahaha, that last one is awesome.

wiarumas · 10-21-2008, 04:40 PM

lol last one was my favorite too

modular2valve · 10-22-2008, 02:36 AM

^^^ the third one was funny as hell. i might have to try it out.

Herbstang · 10-23-2008, 08:16 AM

Don't try the this one !!!! Denise is still pissed as all hell. I thought she had a sense of humor. She was whining about something not fitting right and asked my option so I thought I'd be funny and replied "It's just more of you to love"

1234 · 10-23-2008, 11:24 AM

^^Your a brave man.

Herbstang · 10-23-2008, 01:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1234

^^Your a brave man.

Smoked one bowl to many

modular2valve · 10-24-2008, 01:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Herbstang

Don't try the this one !!!! Denise is still pissed as all hell. I thought she had a sense of humor. She was whining about something not fitting right and asked my option so I thought I'd be funny and replied "It's just more of you to love"

LMAO. herb, u are the man.