The difference between men and women! - Mustang Evolution

Go Back   Mustang Evolution > Off Topic Forums > The Bar



Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Please support our sponsors and let them know you heard about them here!
Old 08-06-2004, 11:19 AM   #1
Registered Member
Regular
 
Hoover's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Region: Other
Posts: 45
Send a message via AIM to Hoover
Talking The difference between men and women!

How to Shower Like a Woman

1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.

2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups.

4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.

5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins..

6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.

8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red..

9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa Cake body wash.

10. Rinse conditioner off hair.

11. Shave armpits and legs.

12. Turn off shower.

13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.

14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.

16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

AND NOW

How To Shower Like a Man

1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo' sound.

3. Look in the mirror, look at your wiener and scratch your ***.

4. Get in the shower.

5. Wash your face

6. Wash your armpits.

7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.

9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.

11. Shampoo your hair.

12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

13. Pee.

14. Rinse off and get out of shower.

15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.

16. Admire wiener size in mirror again.

17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.

19. Throw wet towel on bed.

Maybe not all in that order.
Hoover is offline   Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Old 08-06-2004, 11:27 AM   #2
Registered Member
Regular
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 75
thats awesome
__________________
http://www.mustangevolution.com/foru...ine=1089763695
Quote:
Originally Posted by jimmy_beaner
This is America, where every vote counts, unless it's a vote for a Democrat.
thirstymate is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-06-2004, 11:27 AM   #3
Legacy Member
Legacy
 
Bane-'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Region: Maryland
Posts: 614
Send a message via AIM to Bane-
thats just about true but one thing thats wrong is I dont have a wife so I just shake it at my g/f going to shower or not. and i dont have a full length mirror in bathroom. just this little thing that looks like it should belong in a vanity set lol
__________________
'04 Roush F150 ( totalled while parked )
'89 Gt Hatchback H/C/I, 1.6 rockers, 75mm maf, 24lb, 70mm tb, cai, udp, full exhaust, msd ignition, 373s, Eibach Springs, Lakewood 50/50 rears, Adj Rear Control arms, A/C Delete, Smog Delete, EGR Delete,
Bane- is offline   Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Old 08-06-2004, 11:29 AM   #4
Legacy Member
Legacy
 
V6STANG007's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Region: Florida
Posts: 1,657
Send a message via AIM to V6STANG007 Send a message via Yahoo to V6STANG007
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hoover
15. Check entire body for zits...
eeeeewwwwwww!!!!!!!
__________________
Jorge ~

Quote:
Originally Posted by Danger Dude
OK you are right!!! Maybe I am the Old Crazy One
V6STANG007 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-06-2004, 12:28 PM   #5
Registered Member
Regular
 
Dragon_Lady's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Region: Washington
Posts: 34
Send a message via Yahoo to Dragon_Lady
:shower: LMFAO!!! Soooo True.
__________________
"Opinions are like @$$holes...everyone has one...some are just bigger than others"
All Stock! getting ready for some minor mods: tinting, new bumper and/or bodykit, 3:73 gears, underdrive pullies, tires (they're getting bad) considering new rims. Oh ya- gonna chip it. Thanks for all your suggestions and time answering my questions guys!
Dragon_Lady is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-06-2004, 12:49 PM   #6
Legacy Member
Legacy
 
Falcon's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Region: Michigan
Posts: 1,438
Send a message via AIM to Falcon Send a message via MSN to Falcon Send a message via Yahoo to Falcon
hahahaha
__________________
-Derek
1999 Trans Am WS6
Full Stainless Magnaflow Exhaust, Stainless Longtubes/Off Road Y-Pipe, QTP E-Cutout, HP Tuners, Super Sucker Ram Air Kit, BMR Tunnel Brace/Driveshaft Safety Loop, Hotchkis Panhard Bar, Hypertech 160 Thermostat, CF Whisper Air Lid, Corvette FRCs, K&N, !AIR, !EGR
Falcon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-06-2004, 01:14 PM   #7
I liek gramer
Legacy
 
WhiteStang99's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Region: Florida
Posts: 8,537
Send a message via AIM to WhiteStang99
hahaha, dammit! I was gonna use this smiley: :shower:

this is the only time I've seen where it would be applicable! Oh well.

that was so funny. Got funny looks from co-workers.. haha
WhiteStang99 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-06-2004, 03:48 PM   #8
Registered Member
Regular
 
Dragon_Lady's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Region: Washington
Posts: 34
Send a message via Yahoo to Dragon_Lady
Ya, Half My Office Is Busting Up In Laughter...nobody Is Getting Any Work Done Today.
__________________
"Opinions are like @$$holes...everyone has one...some are just bigger than others"
All Stock! getting ready for some minor mods: tinting, new bumper and/or bodykit, 3:73 gears, underdrive pullies, tires (they're getting bad) considering new rims. Oh ya- gonna chip it. Thanks for all your suggestions and time answering my questions guys!
Dragon_Lady is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Lower Navigation
Go Back   Mustang Evolution > Off Topic Forums > The Bar

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
White Men Must Respect Black Women but Black Men Don't Brent The Bar 77 12-29-2009 12:05 AM
Men just have to know hottcobra The Bar 15 02-15-2009 04:12 AM
How men and women differ hottcobra Pictures and Videos 9 02-09-2009 05:31 PM
Women are so much better financial planners than men... lowflyn The Bar 7 01-19-2009 03:06 PM
Who is going to see X-Men three this weekend? SpectorV The Bar 30 05-30-2006 12:33 PM

» Like Us On Facebook



05:04 PM


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Content Relevant URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0

MustangEvolution.com is in no way associated with or endorsed by Ford Motor Company.