You can't fix stupid... (ironic i post this, eh?)

[Cajun JungleBoy]

lol, anyways, some pretty funny stuff here:


You Just Can't Fix Stupid!!

ONE
Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that
you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I
asked for a half dozen nuggets. "We don't have half dozen
nuggets," said the teenager at the counter. "You don't?" I
replied. "We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the
reply. "So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can
order six?" "That's right." So I shook my head and ordered
six McNuggets

TWO
I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few
items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt
close to mine. I picked up one of those "dividers" that
they keep by the cash register and placed it between our
things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had
scanned all of my items, she picked up the "divider",
looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it.
Not finding the bar code she said to me, "Do you know how
much this is?" I said to her "I've changed my mind, I
don't think I'll buy that today." She said "OK," and I
paid her for the things and left. She had no clue to what
had just happened.

THREE
A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her
floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I
inquired as to
what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the
Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so
she was using the ATM "thingy."

FOUR
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her
car. " Do you need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I
knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote
door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think
they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have
a battery to fit this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an
alarm, too?" I asked. "No, just this remote thingy," she
answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the
key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't
you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a
long walk."

FIVE
Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too
swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary
and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?"
"Just use copier machine paper," the secretary told her.
With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece
of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make
five "blank" copies.

SIX
I was in a car dealership a while ago, when a large motor
home was towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle
was in dire need of repair and the whole thing generally
looked like an extra in "Twister." I asked the manager
what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the
"cruise control" and then went in the back to make a
sandwich.

SEVEN
My neighbor works in the operations department in the
central office of a large bank. Employees in the field
call him when they have problems with their computers. One
night he got a call from a woman in one of the branch
banks who had this question: "I've got smoke coming from
the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire
downtown?"

EIGHT
Police inRadnor , Pa . interrogated a suspect by placing a
metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to
a photocopy machine. The message "He's lying" was placed
in the copier, and police pressed the copy button each
time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth.
Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect
confessed.

NINE
A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if
she needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid
was eating ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid
some Benadryl and it should be fine .. The mother says, I
just gave him some ant killer.....

Dispatcher: Rush him to the emergency room!

Life is tough . It's tougher if you're stupid
and remember - these people can vote.

[at7311]

[Herbstang]

we need to wipe out those gene pools

[Aidan_04]

haha.. some of those gave me a good giggle.

:P

[wiarumas]

haha wow...

[1234]

awesome

[Mustang GT HO]

I almost pissed myself laughing.